I hate dieting!!

OK I know it is not dieting, it is a lifestyle, but I wish that I could just eat and not have to worry about anything like so many of my friends.

I have PCO…which is a condition with my ovaries that is partly caused by excess weight.  The strongest chance I have of getting rid of this condition is to lose weight.  Trouble is, it is harder to lose weight because of the hormonal imbalances (at least that’s what the gyne told me).  I’m not supposed to get discouraged when I work really hard and see very small results. 

Well my brain knows that I should not get discouraged, but I still do.  Over the past few weeks I have been working hard at my weight watchers counting (aside from the one day at the ex, but even that was not that bad), and what have I to show for it?  I was up 2lbs last week and lost only .8 this week.  It makes me want to quit when I work so hard and don’t see the results. 

Sometimes they try to tell you that it should not be that hard but it is for me.  If it was easy I could eat everything I wanted, but I can’t do that without ballooning in weight, so I have to make sacrifices.  I’m willing to do that for the good of my health.  (Having PCO, I’m prone to get diabetes, and am already pre-diabetic).  I just wish that I could see the pay off now because this is too frustrating.

These are busy days

I’ve been busy over the last week or so.  I had my meeting with the lady that has a say whether or not I get into CFOT.  I don’t really know how it went, can’t really say it went good or bad.  Which is good, I don’t think I sent her running back to her room thinking that they should not let me in.

Then there was the Commissioning (ordination) weekend for my friends, and of course I was at all the events that I could be….you would not have caught me anywhere else.

I’m so excited for my friends, they have completed their training and are on their way to their first appointments as ministers in the Salvation Army.  These are exciting days for them, and sad ones for me.

I love the cadets we had at my church this year, they were awesome.  I am very sad to see them go.  Which kind of makes me wonder, how I am going to handle to constant goodbyes that come with Salvation Army officership.  I guess it will always be sad to say goodbye, but we must obey when the Lord calls.

Rolling Rolling Rolling

Tomorrow I have to meet the Candidates Secretary…which makes me really nervous.

1. She is a stranger…what do you talk about with someone you don’t know?

2. She has a say in whether or not I get into CFOT

What if I go there and act like myself, and she does not like me?

What if I go there and act like someone else and she can tell I am being fake?

What if she asks me hard questions?

What if she is not nice to me? 

I am so nervous it is not funny.  I just feel like the entire thing is going to be her sizing me up…which it might not even be. 

In other news I counted every last ounce of food that went in my mouth last week and I only lost 1.6lbs.  Yeah 1.6 is good, but I had just hoped for at least 2 after making all those good food choices.  I have not let that discourage me though, I am keeping up with it, and writing every last ounce that goes in my mouth this week.  Hopefully it will pay off more.

 

You’ve gotta be kidding me!

Warning Rant ahead.

Ok I don’t think that when it comes to work, my standards are all that high.  Or are they?

Let me start off by saying in no way, shape, or form do I think that I am the measure of work standards.  I’m not perfect, and I can find a million things that I don’t do well, so before I rant on about the couple of frustrations I have had with other people, I know I am not perfect and can use improvement…I don’t need you to point out my own short comings.  This is just my blog, and I am expressing something that frustrated me today I can do that.

I work in a day service, supporting adults living with mental disabilities (a debate which we can save for another post).  We have 50 individuals that we support and about 14 staff.  I don’t know where you are at 14 staff may seem a lot for 50 people, or it might seem like too little.  For us though it is a pretty good fit, more and we would have too many staff…less and we would be too stretched to provide the care required to the individuals that we support.

There are a few days each summer where we are stretched a little bit more because we provide a travel club to those we support.  The travel club is a 3 day 2 night excursion to somewhere not too far from the city, that just provides people with an opportunity to have some fun for a couple of days.  This takes 4 staff with about 9 people….so leaving us with 10 staff for 41 people…which is not too bad.  Now count that down to 9 because one of the staff had booked some time off.  Still not too bad, but not a time for anyone to be calling in sick unless they are actually dying.  Staff know this, they know we are going to be kind of tight, so no one calls in sick right???

WRONG!!!!!!

Not just does one person call in sick, but they call in and they are not sick they are just not coming in to work because their other job (where they work casual shifts….not permanent full time like here) called and needs someone to go in so they have decided to go there.  It could  be just me, but I think this is unacceptable.  You don’t call in at your permanent full-time job, to go into a casual job.  This is not a drop in center.  I don’t think that acceptable on a normal day, now take in to account that we’re already short here because of the staff away on the trip.  Maybe you don’t see the problem with this kind of action, but even if you ARE going to not come to work….I’d venture to say that possibly that the most stupid thing that you could do is to call your permanent job and tell them that you are doing it.  “uh yeah I’m going to leave you really short today so that I can go to my other job”  Better leave it at I don’t feel well and am not coming in today.  Honestly, perhaps you are not planning a lifetime career here (there is big turnover in this field), but you need a reference in the future?  Don’t come looking for a good one from here.

So the day goes smoothly and no one else calls in sick right?

Technically right!

Another one of the staff just decided not to show up.  Now I would be worried about staff just not showing up to work, but here is the story with this one.  This is a staff that used to work here full time, but left to go to school.  We have hired this staff as a summer student, to work while they are off school.  Great someone who already knows the job and knows everyone right?  Except this person was here for a month (they had arranged this with us prior), and has been back from that month off for 2 days now.  So in the month and 2 days that this person has worked here, they have had 3-4 sick days already, none of which they have called in to let us know about.   They don’t answer their phone either when we call to check on them.  Honestly, not cool.  Again even more not cool that they do it when we are already short staffed.

If this was any other workplace, neither of these two people would still be working here.  We’re so lax here though, we let everything slide.  That has to be the #1 thing that irritates me about my job.  You can not run an organization effectively by letting employees walk all over you. 

Get a brain, and get to work!

Well it is time for a diet update I guess

I weighed in 2lbs less at weight watchers this week.  Which is good, but considering it had been 3 weeks since my last weigh in not so good either.

Still I press on, I am at the doctor on July 8th and hope to at least be a bit down from what I was when I saw him last.

I bought my tent this weekend and I put it up tonight to see how to do it.  Pretty good, I am really looking forward to my camping trip this summer now.

So my officer told me last night that she was going to start pressing things on to get my full case papers going for CFOT, so today they emailed me and got some more information from me.  So hopefully that will start moving a little quicker.

I do have to take a course, but I’d kinda like to wait until later to take it to get a feel for whether or not I will get accepted because the course is $900 and you only get reimbursed if you get accepted.  $900 is a lot of money.

Other than that nothing much is new.  I am all moved in to my parents house now, getting ready to save all the money that is required.  So things are rolling, I just hope that they roll the right way.

So very Tired

So very tired still.  Slept until 2PM today.  Need more rest.

There are 54 days until my camping trip…up to Bird’s Hill Park Campground.

I am looking forward to getting up there to use the time in a few different ways. 

First and foremost I am looking forward to the time alone to relax and rest and be by myself.  Of course it is a campground and there will be other people in close proximity, but I will be by myself still.  I am very much an introvert, which can be difficult at times since I am always around people.  So this time of solitude should help me to recharge with the energy I need to get through to the next time I am able to spend alone.

It will also be a chance for me to get some reading done.  I love reading, but I rarely have the time for it these days.  I used to read a bit before bed, but now by the time I get to bed it’s all I can do to even get my head to the pillow before I start falling asleep.  So I have a few books on my radar, 3 of which I already own (The Gospel According to Starbucks, The Wounded Healer, and Lost) Although I hope to have those 3 done by the time camping rolls around.  I also have these 3 books on my radar to buy, Exiles:Living intentionally in a Post Christian Culture, Women in the Church: A Biblical Theology of Women in Ministry, and The End Of Religion: Encountering the Subversive Spirituality of Jesus.  Although those could change as I browse through Amazon over the next while.

Another reason I am looking forward to camping, is I will be able to walk or bike some of the trails there and take some pictures.  I love taking pictures, but again like the reading just haven’t had time to get out there and do it.  I’m not the type to carry around my camera just in case, so perhaps some intentional picture taking while I am there. 

Ok I am looking forward to this way too much.

I am exhausted

And my sister did most of the work. 

This weekend was moving weekend.  My sister and I moved as much as we could out of my apartment and over to my parents place.  It was 2 days of work and I was almost going to cry because it looked like we were never going to make a dent in the stuff…until I let Linda just start throwing stuff away.

So now all we have left is the big stuff to move…a dresser, bottom half of my china cabinet, my bed, my desk and a bookshelf.  I have no idea where all this is going to fit in my parents place and I am pretty sure they don’t either.

I hate moving.  Hate it.  Which is funny, because I am working towards a life profession that will see me moving very often.  I keep telling myself though at least there will be no big furniture to move, and they will get me movers to move the boxes…..that’s the one part of being a Salvation Army officer that I will hate…..moving.

Camping was fun

Well I am back from camping and it was fun.  In true Manitoba form, the weather was a little wonky for part of this May long weekend.  It’s rained a little on Saturday morning for like 2 minutes…while we were still sleeping.  Saturday afternoon was very very windy.  The dining tent kept getting blown in.  Other than that the weather was really nice, and I am even sporting a sunburn as proof.  This morning there was rain, but again while we were still sleeping.

I think the funniest part of the weekend was last night at the fire.  One of the guys got his marshmallow on fire and he was shaking it to get it out, well the marshmallow flew right off his stick and onto my foot.  It was still on fire when it landed on my foot, so that hurt quite a bit.  I created a hey my foot is on fire dance, and spent the rest of the night soaking my foot in ice to cool it down.  The funniest thing about it was that the closest cold liquid to pour over my burning foot right away was a bottle of Coke.  I guess I now prefer coke to pepsi…

Here is a pic of my toe…..actually not bad considering it was ON FIRE….it could have been a lot worse, we thought we were going to peel skin off when we took the marshmallow off but we did not.

 

Blame it on the Rain

Well the May Long is upon us. 

There are 3 things that will always happen on the may long weekend well at least they have been my experience over the last few years.

1.  It will be cold, we have not yet hit our balmy summer weather in Winnipeg, and we don’t usually until after the long weekend.  It’s ok during the days, but at night…cold

2.  It will rain.  Whether it is a few showers here or there, or a downpour that last for hours it will rain.

3.  Despite these 2 undeniable facts, hundreds of crazy Winnipeggers will head out of the city to go camping.  I am one of these crazy people, although I do not “rough it” I will be counted among the crazy. 

I’m looking forward to it, last year was my first year going and I had a blast…and it was so relaxing.  This year they are actually calling for good weather (knock on wood).  No matter what happens though, no matter what the weather.  I know I will have a good time because I will be away from everyday life, relaxing and chilling with some of the people I love.

So here’s to may long, thank you Queen Victoria…without you I’d have to go to work on Monday.

New Books

I’m excited because I got some new books recently so I am happy.

I got lost by Gregory Maguire.  I like his writing, so I expect this book to be good.  I got that one from my sister for my birthday.

Today with some of my birthday money I picked up The Wounded Healer, by Henri Nouwen.  It came highly recommended by several friends so I hope it is good.  I don’t really know what it is about.

I also picked up the Gospel According to Starbucks by Leonard Sweet.  I’m not positive as to why I picked this one up, I am not a big Sweet fan.  I saw him at a conference once…he was one of the speakers, and I just found him arrogant.  He did not impress me at all, however I hear rave reviews about this book so I’ll give it a read.

I’ll let you know how they go.